In football it’s sadly important to know your vocabulary. There are so many odd words used and you just simply can’t know them all, or at least not in different languages. Therefore, our editor Axel Falk will teach you some useful German football vocabulary to satisfy all your vocal needs.
In my 20 years of life, language has always been a big part of me. Ever since my first words (Inzhagi is offside, dad), my whole life has been about it. This showed a few years ago when I decided I should learn German and succeeded in two years of studying in school. Then my interest grew and I soon found myself stuck in a teutophilistic dense forest with no apparent way out. This of course lead to me wanting to learn more about Bundesliga than I already knew and to learn more about German music than I already knew. The German language was my road to salvation and thus I will try to teach you my knowledge to spread the love for the best league in the world. Let’s start simple.
Tor: Well, as you possibly already knew, this means ”goal” and the word is used whenever talking about the ball rolling past the goal line. It’s really quite simple. The most epitomizing moment in history is for me Hansa Rostock’s goal in the last minutes of the match against Eintracht Frankfurt in the title-deciding game in ’91. This was a goal that made Stuttgart the champions instead of my beloved Eagles from Main. I have been disgusted by the city and docks of Rostock ever since. Whether this goal is negative or not to you probably depends on whether your team is a good one or not. Pronunciation in English: Toah
Verteidiger: This means ”defender” and is used as you’d expect. I played as a defender when I played football, but sadly my best attributes were my brilliant passing and touch (oh, no. Axel’s at it again with the bragging) so I never actually experienced the love for a good defender. What I did experience however, was the blatant hate for a defender who had made a mistake. It’s perhaps the hardest position on the field and without a doubt the easiest to blame due to their place on the pitch. However, I’ve found that the German defenders are often more appreciated than in other countries. Whether this is down to the likes of Franz Beckenbauer or not, I have no clue, but the German defenders have always been appreciated and they’ve often been good. The current German generation of defenders includes Jerome Boateng, Per Mertesacker, Mats Hummels, Mustafi, Höwedes, Stefan Bell, John Anthony Brooks (his dual-citizenship allows him to play for USA, a chance he took due to the competition in the German squad.). Considering that this generation isn’t even the best of them all, you can imagine ”Germany having a good defence” has been a common saying for a while. Pronunciation in English: Fettidigah (the "i" as in United)
Torwart: Basically Oliver Kahn. Pronunciation in English: Toahwaatt.
Sweeper Keeper: Now, this is not necessarily a German expression, but it has come to represent a certain Manuel Neuer who has made this expression his. Has there ever been a Sweeper Keeper like him before? No, I don’t think so. Manuel Neuer is a genius. I’d say it’s quite obvious what it means. Pronunciation in nahuatl: Tiaskeh nik tlakachihua
Sturmer: This lovely word flows in a delicious way in your mouth and basically means Gerd Müller. The feared striker is one of those who really epitomizes the word, possibly together with Hamburg’s old striker Uwe Seeler and in most recent time, Claudio Pizarro. One could argue that Robert Lewandowski is a ”sturmer”, bu he really isn’t. Nobody knows what Lewandowski actually is. The same basically goes for Thomas Müller, even though he has been given his own special word. Pronunciation in English: Schtuumah
Raumdeuter: Thomas Müller. A striker? Yeah, but no. A winger? Yeah, but no. An attacking midfielder? Yeah, but no. So what is he? No clue, but he is good. Pronunciation in English: Raumdoitah.
Abseits: This is a very important word, because it seems to be the only one some linesmen know. The meaning of it is ”offside” and has sadly become a very central part of the game with very shady rules. This rule might destroy a whole season for some teams while it does the opposite for others. It’s often very unfair and while life is unfair, football really isn’t. In a game where the team with the most goals wins, how does the rule of offside fit? It would fit if they were to make it more clear. The player this word is directly connected to is of course Filippo Inzhagi, who, according to his birth certificate, was born offside. Pronunciation in English: Appsits (the "i" as in United).
Danke und Ciao.
editor, self-proclaimed self-proclaimer and not really a nihilist.
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